If Life was a bag of trail mix, I'd be the only Cranberry in the bag.

I thought up that line this morning laying in bed, trying to decide if I was too bitter or to bitchy or if I held onto grudges too long. How long is too long? A month? A half year? Years?

Aren't something worth holding onto more begrudgedly then others?

I always say don't sweat the small stuff, but I am a hypocrite. I totally sweat the small stuff. But I also let it go. If I don;t think about it for a week, then I've let it go.

The big stuff, yah I hold onto. Things are just meant to be remembered. Plus. I'm a Sag, Sag's are notorious for holding on to grudges forever. We're stubborn, and hardheaded and its what we do. Remember the bad things that happen to us so we can hold it against the person that did it to us years from now and make them feel guilty even though we -really- don't care.

For example; this is something I know I'm going to remember for years.

My birthday.

I'm turing 25, and thats kinda big right? So I invite all my friends to come to my party at Zaphods cause holy crap my birthday falls on the only night that I go out. Which is oddly a tuesday but hey, wtf are wednesday's for but staying in bed wishing it was friday. Anyway. I let EVERYONE I know know at least a month in advance that man, don't make plans for the tuesday of the 27th cause you're coming out to my party right??

Those who can let me know, those who can't let me know and its all good. Hence what letting everyone know in advance is about right?

Well...my birthday rolls around and one person. I shall call her M. sez she's coming, then cancels, then sez she's coming, then cancels, then sez for sure she's coming out, she's had it bad the last week and needs to party with her friends. Sweet! I even don't care her asshole boyfriend is coming with her.

SO they get downtown, like three hours too early and asshole boyfriend doesn't have any i.d.

How does he expect to get into a club without i.d? I dunno. But he thinks cause he might know the bouncer he will.

So via cell phone calls on my way to my managers place and then to club my friend decides, instead of staying at the club (cause she has i.d. and her assh...boyfriend doesn't, she's gonna bounce, even though its one of her best friends 25th birthday and she's really excited about hanging out with M. finally outside of work.

Uh.huh. riiight.

so. I tell her what ever, its really selfish of her that she's promise to come to my party and bounce on account of her boyfriend (HEY LOOK I FORGOT THE ASSHOLE THAT TIME...don't worry I was thinking it) doesn't have any i.d. cause he's basically a putz and so big deal, she's only breaking a promise to her friend on her birthday, so w/e we'll see each other at work, just don't expect me to be happy to see you cause you tromped on my feelings in your knock off skater shoes and wiggled you flabby hinny around in your ugly ass skinny keans.

Well, come the next time she's at work, it turns out M. has been talking smack about how selfish I was and how I don't care that she's going through a hard time, and I'm gonna stay mad at her forever cause you know, thats what I do, I hold grudges.

Umm...wouldn't you??

Anyway. I hear this and I think to myself, nah this is too easy, I'm going to be UBER!nice to her the next time I see her just to rub it in her face she talked all this smack to me its not true and she's gonna look the fool not me.

Guess who's acting all bitchy and snobbish? Not the Yve oh hellz no, man I had so much fun WITHOUT her and her boyfriend I actually don't care that she bounced cause I know she'd have just thrown herself around the club and acted the hot cookie n basically just put a whole sluttish turn on the night, M. is the one being all cold and rank and notfun. Not the Yve people. The Yve doesn't care. The Yve rocked her 25th like no ones fucking business.

So I hears it today from a little bird that she's been calling me two-faced.

HOW THE HELL HAVE I BEEN TWO FACED?!?

Okay, seriously people, I hadn't even had a chance to see this girl before she got up all on me acting like I'm the bad guy. Um. Hate to sound pretensious but when you pick your man before your girls....especially on your girls birthday...YOU ARE A BITCH no doubt about it.

Wasn't it Ren that said to me once Ho's before Bro's Yve.. Ho's before Bro's?!?

Yah I finally got what you meant Ren...and I totally see where you are coming from.

What I love is she went to Lawrence with all of this trying to fish out informationon what I've been saying about her. HA. Funneh. I haven't said anything that isn't true.

:P So much for living in that drama-free bubble.

Ironically Lawrence asked how we managed to stay friends for so long with all the smack we talk about each other. Truthfully, when I answered him, I said I don't know, but we do...how the hell do we anyway?

So yah, I wasn't PLANNING on holding a grudge about this but that kinda pissed me off that she made it to seem like I was the bad guy when she picked her ASSHOLE before her friend.

-flips the british bird- JOG ON, prick.

In other news.

ITS FUCKING COLD!!!

It's snowed on and off for the last week, and it finally cleared up today and it got FUCKING COLD!!!

Its like -17 celcius and yah. COLD. Wtf. its only going up to -11 tomorrow and we might hit -2 on monday. BRRRR. I hope this means that the canal will be frozen and ready for skating on in time for X-mas. I'm planning on asking for skates for Yule this years. I haven't skated in years but the last time I was in skates and on the canal I made it from downtown to dows lake in twenty minutes. Thats almost 7.8 k people!!!
I figure because I spent a good two and half months biking back and forth from the glebe to st. laurent I should be in fairly good shape to skate every other day from dows lake (twenty minute walk from my parents place) to downtown before school....thats the idea anyway....if it happens....LOL.

Fuck I prattle on endless about crap don't I? Oh well.

Hi Phil!

:D

When Good Girls Go Goth

So. Last night I was ordered to attend industrial night at Zaphods cause my friend Alex was djing and Lawrence insisted.

Well two pretty goth boys begging me to attend makes a girl go weak and not think about it. It being I'm closing, then opening at my new job. With my manager. then going to class, then to my second job.

No, no I can handle a couple hours at Zaphods. I can go with only a few hours sleep if I don't drink.

right?

right?

if I don't drink right??

Yah, well. Why would you go to a bar and not drink??

Smirnoff Ice and Jagerbombs.

BAD COMBINATION.

I wasn't trashed, but I did slur. alot. and dance. alot. Now I am yawning. Alot.
But I did it, I even left early. I was planning on staying until 1:30 but I left at 1. Cabbed home, (cause I was wobbly and walking home BLOWS) and crashed the second I came in the door.

I was up at 7:30 and out the door by ten to 8 and at work by 8:30. Which means, I've been up longer then I was asleep.

I still have to work tonight and do my homework. GROSS.

But the pretty goth boys were fun. Especially the one with the fangs and sexy hair. N Alex who was dressed up as...LOL Alex from Clockwork Orange, N...mmmm goth boys.

Minion needs sleep.

bluh...

oh yah...

HAPPY HALLOWE'EN!!!

The Epic Painting

About a month and a half ago, my long time friend Jason commissioned a portrait of himself from me. A big one. A huge massive one.

I know my limits so I said, deal if we cut it down by half.

He said deal.

We haggled over price and we settled on a cherry deal.

Now came the time to paint it. Well I had a month off school so I thought I could do it easy-peasy nice and sleezy in my time from work.

Wellz. Inspiration blows. I suck. I haven't been able to draw or paint or anything for ages. Not a fucking thing.

I get sketches done, and a idea of how I want to do it and gets Jas's approval to start. Start my sketches, start my painting and I spill spaghetti sauce all down the canvas one drunken night.

FFFFUUUUUUCCCCCKKKKKKK

another reason why Yve needs to avoid spaghetti sauce.

So. What do I do?

Wait till the very last possible moment, go out bring home a new canvas and ignore it.

I have to tell Jason.

Crap.

three days later I'm on the y!m with Vade and inspiration hits. SWEET I start drawing.

two days later I'm at Phil's house with Lawrence getting high. I get hit with MAD inspiration. SWEETNESS.

yesterday I come home, sit down and start to paint.

See the images?! Thats what I've done so far. Since last night.

I will keep you posted as I go, I want to have this done....SOON.

Its a 24" by 36" canvas and I'm painting with acrylic paints.

wish me luck.

----edited to say----

I hate the format of pictures in this fucking blog. Will figure it out soon I promise.

Feeding Day!

So today is feeding day.

Yup, feeding day. Feed the snake, misser Kaa is starting a shed and I wanted to get some food into him before he gets so surly he snaps at me when I refill his water bowl. Okay not snaps but hisses in a menacing fashion.

HOLD ON---> he's swallowing want to watch....its his first rat (or rather my first rat I've fed to him)

Okay he's doing fine....sorry...

He's an adopted pet, I bought him off Rob who does my tattoo's and I can't recall if he's ever feed him rats before and the pet store was fresh out of large mice so I settled on two small rats, and I've been a bit worried that he'd have a hard time with them, but he looks like he's doing fine... -goes and checks-

-comes back a little green- rats stink. HARD.

For those of you who don't know. Kaa is my ball python, he's a darling year old boy (assuming its a boy) and I've had him for nearly seven months. I love him. I pamper him and I definitely cuddle him to the extreme. Yes, you can cuddle snakes. You just gotta know how.

Anyway, Kaa is very aggressive when it comes to feeding I've noticed. He has a hardcore attack pattern that never ceases to send the heebiejeebies down my spine. He doesn't recoil and strike a pose, he doesn't wait and taste the air, the little bastard sees me coming with the dangling mouse and as soon as its an inch away -WHAM- he's got it by the head or shoulders and he's thrown himself around it. Normally he gets my hand, but I've been getting really good at letting go in time for him to just get the food.

-pauses to check on the swallowing-

GAWDS, I turned arund and he was body up, head totally gauged and rat feet dangling, he's working on the tail now!! GAWDS!!! AHH!! GROSS!!! you could see the rat travelling down his throat....ugh totally cool but totally nasty.

Anyway. So today I brought the rats home, thawed the smaller of the two in some hot water, (sorry I know, frozen, I'm a wimp shaddup) and gave it too him.

Immidiate snap grab reaction...no coil though...so I daringly stick a hand in, and the fucking idiot missed the rat and got himself, by the back of the neck. >.<>.<

---

Anyway I spent the weekend at my parents place, Saterday I worked at Rideau, one of my last shifts with Claire's and I tried to have fun, but lets face it. I have been looking to leave that company for a few months now and I'm so happy to peace out, it was so fucking mental, seriously I was at cash for 90% of the day and I ran through 1000$ worth of sales. just myself. just lil ol' me.

I was tired my hip hurt so I bused home to my parents and I feel asleep on the bus, which is only like...a fifteen twenty minute ride. Ugh. I splurged on some butter chicken from Indian Express, and went home to crash out hard on the couch. I watched a couple of movies, oooOOOooo Triple X, The Fifth Element, n Snatch . I gots to play with mah puppeh, and yah. Lazy. It was all a very lazy weekend.

Now I am back in school and its like...ugh.

Last friday I found outh The Fatal Attraction broke up with his girlfriend and since then I haven't seen him, in fact I only heard that from the creepy redhead who works in the mall, so if and when I see him, I have to play dumb. Truthfully, its actually kind of sad news cause from what I gathered in my many slouthy reconisence (I so spelt that wrong) missions they'd been together for 8 years. Holy hell, thats a long time, that likes all my serious relationships all rolled into one. UGH. How they lasted that long is beyond me. Rumor is that they're gonna get back together but I'm like secretly inside 'oh hellz no, not before I get my hands on him' but thats just me being sadistic and wants the things I know I can't have, but wants. :P

Ima bad girl.

---

Lawrence spent the night on Friday after getting completely totally fucking wrecked at Phil's house. That was fun. Moment of genius that wasn't genius? You know the donut hole game. you make a ring with your thumb and index and hold it below your waist and if someone looks at it you pound them? HAHAH yah we played that game and I was looking at phil's tank and said he should get n apple snail and went 'prolly this big' and not even thinking made the donut.

Phil totally looked at it, even though I wasn't trying to make the donut and Lawrence caught it and started to laugh. Thats when I realized what I had done. >.<>

I do have to thank Izzy for my Pomegrante. It was made of good. :D

-scratches head- thats about it.

Ta Y'all!!!