Make Me Unsee It

Srsly.

I saw something today I wish to unsee. The whole half hour adventure with Jebbeh was an unsee event.

This morning whilst wandering the mall I saw a girl wearing a red knit dress/sweater/shirt thing, gold...Metallic gold leggings and shiny metallic gold shoes.

okay I can give her merit for trying to work the whole legging/dress-shirt/flat combo. Its very big right now. Not sure why...but it is.

But here is where she went wrong....OKAY OKAY I know...metallic leggings on whole are wrong but, we're gonna overlook THAT for now...just for now...instead we are going to concentrate on the fact that;

A) they were two or more sizes too small for her, so her her muffin shaped waist/hip/ass region was squeezed into these (albeit already horrid metallic) leggings digging into her waist/hip region giving her whole little clingy knit red dress thing a very dumpling look. Like you know when you put on a pair of last seasons pants and they kind constrict your waist like a rubber band on a balloon full of pudding. YAH. THAT is the mental picture I want you to have right there.

B) they were climbing up her cottage cheese ass like no-ones buisness.

C) they were stained down the front of her thighs like she'd eaten at KFC the night before and used her metallic gold thighs as napkins. And forgot to change when she got up this morning for work.

D) the piece de resistance, (ignoring my HORRIBLE french accent) in the MIDDLE of the food court, she grabbed her waist band (already straining as it is not to roll down like a pair of your little sisters tights you only borrowed cause your last pair had a run in them) CROUCHED like a frog and HIKED them up over her muffin-top roll. Then proceeded to attempt to pick them out of her ass.

In the middle of the food court. At lunch.

You know the crouch I mean, when your new thong has reached unmeasureable heights up your ass, and your wedgie is threatening to merge with your bra clasp and all you can think about is running to the bathroom to readjust in the privacy of your own stall, or for the guys that read this, you rode a bike for far to long and your balls have decided against your better judgment to resemble golfballs and have disappeared like a hole in one.

You know what I mean, try to deny it but you know.

Yah. THAT CROUCH.

MAKE ME UNSEE!!!

---

Statement of the day,

'I'm not eating in class, I'm licking the icing off'

---

Happy Samhain Y'all!

Go forth and be witchy.

You know you want too... so do it.

-insert cackling laughter here-